"CB" (jrcb)
07/17/2019 at 23:01 • Filed to: Consistently shitposting through the ages
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"CB" (jrcb)
07/17/2019 at 23:01 • Filed to: Consistently shitposting through the ages | 3
| 24 |
Over the last seven years here, my only regret is not keeping a tally of if people would rather fight 1 horse- sized duck or 100 duck- sized horses.
*hahaha oh man I have so many regrets more serious than this
Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
> CB
07/17/2019 at 23:06 |
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I would like to know what weapons I can use. A shot gun with 200 rounds and I take on a flock of horses. A kitana sword and I take on huge duck. Bare hands? I’d run.
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CB
> Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
07/17/2019 at 23:09 |
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I imagine it’d be something you personally would have access to. Like, with steel toed boots, I’d rather handle the horses than the duck. My gun? The duck for sure. But no nonsense like “a harpoon” (I returned that) or “a Gatling gun”.
XJDano
> Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
07/17/2019 at 23:11 |
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Yes a lot of unknown factors here. As ducks and mostly horses walk away from humans, so.... do you have bread or apples that you can befriend the horseducks?
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Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
> XJDano
07/17/2019 at 23:18 |
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You gotta go with the assumption that the tiny horses are carnivores.
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Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
> CB
07/17/2019 at 23:18 |
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We are assuming the horses will attack. We all know the ducks will attack.
MoCamino
> CB
07/17/2019 at 23:19 |
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The most dangerous thing I have around would probably be a baseball bat. I think that would just tick a horse-sized duck off, so I choose the tiny horses. The reality is that my wife and daughter are both hard-core animal lovers, so I’d probably bribe the tiny horses with sugar cubes and quality horse feed instead of fighting them. Seriously, how cool would it be to train them to pull tiny chariots and have races in the yard? You could reenact Ben Hur!!!
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CB
> Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
07/17/2019 at 23:23 |
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Horses are assholes. They will attack.
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CB
> MoCamino
07/17/2019 at 23:23 |
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Didn’t a lot of horses die in Ben Hur?
Agrajag
> MoCamino
07/17/2019 at 23:35 |
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I was thinking something similar. Have the 100 horses pull your chariot into battle against the giant duck.
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MoCamino
> CB
07/17/2019 at 23:46 |
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Well , yeah, they did . Fewer for me to fight (or feed).
wafflesnfalafel
> CB
07/17/2019 at 23:51 |
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Duck sized horses - they would probably be even more fragile than a duck sized duck. But a horse sized duck could do some real damage. Science!
way2blu does a rev update
> CB
07/17/2019 at 23:53 |
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That’s a lot of horses, but...
Ducks are mobile across both land and water, and they can FLY. No escaping the MegaloDuck. I’ll take the horses.
WilliamsSW
> CB
07/17/2019 at 23:54 |
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Not just assholes - but stupid assholes.
gmporschenut also a fan of hondas
> CB
07/18/2019 at 00:02 |
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Am I inside or outside, where the duck could fly?
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CB
> gmporschenut also a fan of hondas
07/18/2019 at 00:03 |
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You want to be inside with that monster?
smobgirl
> CB
07/18/2019 at 00:04 |
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Duck sized horses. Set off some fireworks and they’ll spook and scatter. Battle won.
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CB
> smobgirl
07/18/2019 at 00:06 |
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Smart! And the tiny stampede would be adorable.
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gmporschenut also a fan of hondas
> CB
07/18/2019 at 00:08 |
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You want to be outside, where it can swoop down?
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CB
> gmporschenut also a fan of hondas
07/18/2019 at 00:14 |
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I’d rather let it have that than no room to retreat.
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gmporschenut also a fan of hondas
> CB
07/18/2019 at 00:21 |
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but walls would also hinder its abiliity to flap its wings at you.
i think i would also need to know if i could have any weapons
MrDakka
> wafflesnfalafel
07/18/2019 at 00:34 |
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No the horse sized duck would be more fragile.
It’s a still a bird which means hollow bones and if it can fly, it’ll mean most of it’s muscle mass will mostly be for the wings. And because of the square cube law, it’s going to have a small margin for extra weight it can carry while still being able to fly.
Also birds have larger eyes and tus eye so ckets relative to size compared to other species. If this scales the same as the rest of the body, this means a larger percentage of its skull is open to attack, which means increased access to the brain via the optic nerves.
In addition, wings are fragile structures so applying sufficient torque in a direction the wings aren’t meant to move would easily pin and dislocate any number of joints.
Furthermore, ducks have relatively long necks which makes it so easy to choke, snap , tie in a knot, etc.
They also don’t have teeth and have a relatively flat beak which means it’s easy to hold it’s beak shut, while you attack it’s eyes or neck.
Honestly both choices are a cake walk, but the horse sized duck just means less chasing for you to do , minimizing your caloric intake and maximizing your effort to meal ratio.
facw
> CB
07/18/2019 at 06:04 |
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Give me the small horses. I’m pretty sure I can take them (maybe?) A horse sized duck would be pretty terrifying (assuming it doesn’t just collapse under it’s own weight, which it probably would in real life, but that would sort of defeat the point of this question).
RallyDarkstrike - Fan of 2-cyl FIATs, Eastern Bloc & Kei cars
> CB
07/18/2019 at 06:31 |
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Horse-sized duck. Just bring a LOT of bread to feed it and it will become your friend and waddle around after you.
I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker
> CB
07/19/2019 at 23:40 |
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Horse sized duck? You’re nuts. Look at the leg bones on a horse. They’re already feeble, really a specialized finger. Scale that down to duck sized? A hundred? Shit, I could take five hundred, maybe a thousand. A light kick and they’re immobilized, a quick curb stomp and I’m done. At that point the main issue is the psychological trauma that comes with killing a hundred tiny horses.